Robert Enke

Robert Enke was a German football goalkeeper.

Enke most notably played for Benfica and Barcelona, but made the majority of his appearances for Bundesliga side Hannover 96 in his homeland.

He won eight full international caps for the German national team between the 1999 Confederations Cup and his death in 2009, and was part of the squad which finished as runners-up in Euro 2008.

In 2009 was married and at the height of his fame and success. However, he had long suffered from depression.

On November 10, 2009, Robert Enke lost his life to suicide. At the time of his death, he was widely considered to be a leading contender for the German number one spot at the 2010 World Cup. Robert Enke was thirty two years old when he died.

Robert Enke

August 24, 1977 – November 10, 2009

Michael Mantenuto

Michael Mantenuto was an American actor, college ice hockey player, and Army non-commissioned officer, best known for his performance as Olympic ice hockey star Jack O'Callahan in the 2004 Disney biopic Miracle on Ice.

Mantenuto played one season for the University of Maine Black Bears men's ice hockey team. The next season he transferred to the University of Massachusetts at Boston and played one additional season for their team. His then auditioned for the role of Jack O'Callahan, a player on the 1980 Olympic men's ice hockey team, who beat the Soviet Union team. He won that role in the movie, Miracle on Ice.

Manetnuto did not pursue acting as his career though. After a few more roles, he enlisted in the United States Army and served as a Special Forces communications sergeant, also known as a Green Beret. Army Times reported that during his service he was awarded the Army Commendation Medal, three Army Achievement Medals, three Good Conduct Medals and the Global War on Terrorism Service Medal.

Manetnuto suffered from frequent bouts of depression. On April 24, 2017, he died by suicide. Michael Mantnuto was 35 years old when he died.

Michael Mantenuto

May 13, 1981 – April 24, 2017

DAY 26 - Terry Newton

Terry Newton was an English professional rugby league footballer who played in the 1990s and 2000s. He played at representative level for Great Britain, England and Lancashire, and at club level for the Leeds Rhinos, the Wigan Warriors, the Bradford Bulls, and Wakefield Trinity Wildcats. Newton was one of a handful of players to feature in each of the first 15 seasons of Super League.

In February 2010, Newton was given a two-year ban after being one of the first sportsmen to have tested positive for human growth hormone. Seven months later, he died by suicide. Terry Newton was 31 years old when he died.

Terry Newton 

November 7, 1978 – September 26, 2010

DAY 20 - Kenny L. McKinley

 

Kendrick "Kenny" L. McKinley  was an American football wide receiver for the NFL Denver Broncos team. He was drafted by the Broncos in the fifth round of the 2009 NFL Draft. He played college football at University of South Carolina.

In December of 2009 , McKinley was placed on injured reserve with a knee injury.

McKinley suffered from depression, financial problems related to a gambling addiction, and he was dealing with the fact that his injury called into question his post playing career. On September 20, 2010, just nine months after his injury, Kenny McKinley died by suicide. He was 23 years old when he died.

Kendrick "Kenny" L. McKinley 

January 31, 1987 – September 20, 2010

František Rajtoral

František Rajtoral was a Czech football player. He last played for Turkish club Gaziantepspor, and was best known for his stint at Viktoria Plzeň. He was a member of the Czech Republic national football team.

He won the Czech Cup with FC Viktoria Plzeň in 2010. Further trophies he won with the club include the Gambrinus Liga twice and the Czech Supercup.

On 29 February 2012, Rajtoral earned his first cap for the senior team of his country in the 1–1 draw with Ireland in a friendly match.

Rajtoral was described as "one of the best attacking right-wingers in the Czech Republic" by journalist Mark Smith.

Rajtoral confided in his family and loved ones that he struggled with depression. On April 23, 2017, František Rajtoral died by suicide. He was thirty one years old when he died.

František Rajtoral 

March 12, 1986 – April 23, 2017

Roman Yurievich Lyashenko

Roman Yurievich Lyashenko was a Russian ice hockey player. He played professionally in North America for the Dallas Stars and New York Rangers of the National Hockey League (NHL), and also spent time with affiliate teams in the American Hockey League (Utah Grizzlies and Hartford Wolfpack) and the now-defunct International Hockey League (Michigan K-Wings).

Lyashenko also played professionally in Russia for Yaroslavl Torpedo before joining the Stars. He was drafted by the Stars in the second round (52nd overall) of the 1997 NHL Entry Draft. Lyashenko represented Russia internationally at both the junior and senior levels, capturing three medals (gold, silver and bronze) at the World Junior Championships and a silver medal at the World Championships.

Despite his success, Roman Lyashenko died by suicide at the young age of 24 years old.

Roman Yurievich Lyashenko

May 1, 1979 – July 5, 2003

Ryan Freel

Ryan Paul Freel (March 8, 1976 – December 22, 2012) was an American professional baseball player. A utility player, Freel played second base, third base, and all three outfield positions in Major League Baseball for the Toronto Blue Jays, Cincinnati Reds, Baltimore Orioles, Chicago Cubs and Kansas City Royals between 2001 and 2009.

On May 28, 2007, Freel was injured in a game against the Pittsburgh Pirates when chasing a deep drive to right-center field. Freel and a right fielder collided, resulting in Freel's head and neck hitting Hopper and finally the warning track. He was transported by ambulance to Good Samaritan Hospital, where he was reported to be coherent with feeling in his extremities. Freel began working out on June 15, about 2 weeks after the collision. He was briefly sent to the AAA Louisville Bats for rehabilitation. Freel began getting random headaches and pains in his head, which delayed his return for another 2 weeks. On July 3, 2007, 1 month and 5 days after the accident, Freel returned to play for the Cincinnati Reds.

In 2009 with the Baltimore Orioles, he was hit in the head by a pickoff throw while on second base. He was put on the disabled list after the injury, and officially retired a year later.

On December 22, 2012, Ryan Freel died by suicide. After his death, Freel's family donated his brain tissue to Boston University for research into chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE), a degenerative neurological condition associated with multiple concussions which at present can only be conclusively diagnosed postmortem. In December 2013, a postmortem examination by the Center for the Study of Traumatic Encephalopathy showed that he was suffering from Stage II CTE, making him the first MLB player to have been diagnosed with the disease. Ryan was also diagnosed with various mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder, adult ADHD, depression, impulse control disorder and anxiety. Additional mental illnesses are consistent with many athletes who also suffer from CTE once their playing careers are finished.

Ryan Paul Freel 

March 8, 1976 – December 22, 2012

Day 27 - Brain Injury and Suicide Risk

Tiaina Baul "Junior" Seau Jr.
January 19, 1969 - May 2, 2012

NFL linebacker.
10-time All-Pro. 
12-time Pro Bowl selection.
Named to the NFL 1990s All-Decade Team. 
Elected to the Pro Football Hall of Fame.
In 2012 Seau died by suicide. 
He was diagnosed with CTE posthumously.  
Junior Seau was 43 years old when he died.

The link between brain injuries and suicide is undeniable. Studies have shown that both major and minor traumatic brain injuries (TBI) increase suicide risk. Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy (CTE), a degenerative brain disease often associated with athletes, is the result of having suffered multiple head traumas.

The list of those with CTE who had no prior history of mental illness, and then began exhibiting symptoms and/or died by suicide, is extensive. Here is a partial list of Former NFL players with confirmed CTE:

• Jovan Belcher^[4]
• Forrest Blue^[5]
• Bill Bryant^[6]
• Lew Carpenter^[7]
• Dwight Clark^[8]
• Daniel Colchico^[6]
• Lou Creekmur^[9]
• Art DeCarlo^[6]
• Shane Dronett^[10]
• Dave Duerson^[11][12]
• Pete Duranko^[6]
• Ray Easterling^[12][13][14]
• Frank Gifford^[12][15]
• Cookie Gilchrist^[12][16]
• John Grimsley^[17]
• Chris Henry^[12][18]
• Aaron Hernandez^[19]
• Jim Hudson^[6]
• Gerry Huth^[6]
• Tom Keating^[6]
• Terry Long^[1]
• Rob Lytle^[20]
• John Mackey^[12][21]
• Ollie Matson^[12][22]
• Tom McHale^[12][23]
• Earl Morrall^[24]
• Paul Oliver^[6]
• Joe O'Malley^[6]
• Mike Pyle^[6]
• Adrian Robinson^[25]
• Scott Ross ^[26]
• Tyler Sash^[12][27]
• Junior Seau^[12][28]
• Bubba Smith^[12][29]
• Robert Sowell^[6]
• Ken Stabler^[12][30]

The list above is woefully incomplete. At present, CTE can only be diagnosed post mortem. Some families are not comfortable donating the brains of their loved ones for autopsies related to CTE research. Also, understanding how to identify CTE is relatively new. Recognizing and diagnosing the condition has only been possible since 2002. Prior to that, the degenerative brain disease was not yet understood.

CTE was initially identified by the pathologist Bennet Omalu, MD, who performed the autopsy on former NFL player Michael Webster.Webster was 50 years old when he died. Webster had slowly developed increasingly significant symptoms of mental illness during his career in the NFL and following his retirement. After extensive research, Dr. Omalu was the first to discover abnormal proteins in his brain, referred to as neurofibrillary tangles. Today, brain imaging scans show the  permanent impact that concussion related CTE has on a brain:

For those living with the disease, the symptoms are devastating.

(Image above from the Patrick Risha Stop CTE Awareness Foundation)

Given this, understanding and addressing the risk of dying by suicide when a person has suffered a head injury is critical to overall suicide prevention. We must do more research on how to identify brain injury, as often a person who has incurred an injury initially has no (or very minor) outward symptoms.

It is absolutely imperative that people understand that the physiological response to (even minor) head injuries can have a profound impact on long term behavioral symptoms. The two are inextricably linked. Recent studies have shown that having suffered just one concussion leaves a person with a suicide risk that is three times that of those who have not had a head injury at any time during their life.

The urgency of needing more research speaks for itself. Postmortem is not an acceptable time to diagnose a fatal disease.

As a survivor of suicide loss, I also need to say this. The discovery of CTE makes a very important statement about the impact of stigma on suicide. Consider that until CTE was diagnosable, the public perception of of those who suffered from the related symptoms of mental illness and/or died by suicide, was accusatory and ugly. Like all who have struggled with these issues or lost their life in this way - those with CTE were often considered weak of character. Many athletes who died by suicide were deemed selfish and unappreciative of their success.

The pervasive belief that individuals suffering from symptoms of mental illness and who die by suicide are at 'fault' for their death is often wholly inaccurate.

The vast majority of the public still believe that a person who dies by suicide was making a 'choice' that they had entire control over. This is a belief that leads to agonizing questions asked by those left behind. This stigma is believed by the majority of the public, including those who have lost someone to suicide and those who are directly suffering from mental illness. Considering the fact that even one concussion raises suicide risk, why aren't we making diagnosis, awareness, and treatment of CTE and related conditions more of a priority?

Why aren't we comforting those who have lost someone to suicide by telling them that there are often definitive physiological reasons behind years of erratic behavior and suicidality?

Survivors of suicide loss torment themselves with guilt and rage related to questions around why the person they lost did not love them enough to stay alive, or why their own love wasn't enough to keep someone alive.

Again, it is critical that we do more research and that we develop better tools for diagnosis, treatment, and management of all factors that contribute to suicide risk, CTE and head injuries included.

Dave Duerson

David Russell "Dave" Duerson was an American football safety in the National Football League (NFL) who played for the Chicago Bears (1983–1989), New York Giants (1990), and Phoenix Cardinals (1991–1993). He was selected to play in four consecutive Pro Bowls for NFL seasons 1985 through 1988.

On February 17, 2011, Duerson lost his life to suicide. Following his request, his brain was sent to the Boston University School of Medicine for research on chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE). Neurologists at Boston University confirmed that Duerson had CTE as a result of the concussions he suffered during his playing career. Dave Duerson was fifty years old when he died.

Dave Duerson 

November 28, 1960 – February 17, 2011 

Sharing the Same Passion

This week I had to opportunity to speak with Keith O'Neil. If you don't know his name already, let me tell you a little about his accomplishments.

Keith grew up in Amherst, New York. He comes from a family that is passionate about football. His father is former NFL linebacker Ed O'Neil, and his brother Keven played football for Syracuse University.   

Keith's own football talent was evident by high school. In college at Northern Arizona University, he was a four-year letterman and three-year starter with 225 career stops, 20 sacks, 49 tackles for losses, and three interceptions.

In 2003, O'Neil entered the NFL when he was signed by the Dallas Cowboys. He played with the Cowboys for two seasons.

Following playing for the Cowboys, O'Neil played for the Indianapolis Colts. In 2006, he earned a Super Bowl ring when the Colts beat the Chicago Bears in Super Bowl XLI.

I have a great deal of admiration for Keith for many reasons. Though impressive, it's not his athletic accomplishments that are chief among my reasons. I admire Keith because of who he is as a person. I admire him because of his courage and his advocacy.

I admire Keith O'Neil because recently he posted this on his Twitter page:

Keith O'Neil has bipolar disorder. Over the past decade, he has become a vocal advocate for the mentally ill, devoting himself to ending stigma and to helping fund critically needed research. I was excited when Keith offered to share his story with me. 

I'm happy to share with you what Keith has to say about living with bipolar disorder. 

Keith first began experiencing symptoms when he was a child, but he didn't understand what was going on. He'd have insomnia at night when he was anxious, and then there'd be days when he was so depressed, it was difficult for him to get up and do things. Those around him didn't recognize that he was beginning to struggle with bipolar. He was often given the message that he just needed to settle down, or that he just needed to stop 'lying around.'

As a young adult and despite realizing his dream of playing for the NFL, he still struggled. After his first season with the Dallas Cowboys, he told head coach Bill Parcells about his anxiety and insomnia - both hallmarks of the manic side of bipolar. At the time, Keith thought the best thing for him to do would be to retire from professional football. However, Parcells and the team said that they would do their best to get Keith the help he needed so that he could continue playing. 

Two years later, he moved on to play for the Indianapolis Colts, but his bipolar symptoms resurfaced. His anxiety became so hard to manage that four days before opening day he again reached out for help, this time from head coach Tony Dungy.

However, without a clear diagnosis, Keith continued to suffer. Eventually he stopped playing altogether. At one point he felt so despondent, he attempted suicide.

It wasn't until he was 30 years old that he was finally diagnosed as bipolar. Given the diagnosis, suicidal ideation on Keith's part wasn't surprising. Studies show that up to 50% of those with bipolar will make a suicide attempt at some point during their life. The risk is especially high for those who do not have effective treatment.

For Keith, the formal diagnosis of bipolar was initially very painful for him. He says the stigma around mental health issues had a negative impact on his ability to get help and move forward.

"For a year and a half I didn’t tell anyone about my diagnosis, except my immediate family and a few close friends. I was scared to tell others because of fear of what they would think. It was very difficult because as a professional athlete, my life was always very public. Now I was living a secret. The shame and secrecy I felt was as bad as the illness itself."

Eventually, Keith realized that he didn't want others to suffer the same way he was. He began to speak out.

"I want others to know there is no shame in it," he says.

Keith wanted to get his message out to as many people as possible. He is now an internationally known speaker on the topic of mental health awareness. He has written a book, Under My Helmet, A Football Player's Lifelong Battle with Bipolar Disorder.

Although he feels he has now found the right combination of treatments in order to manage his illness, one of his frustrations with his bipolar journey was how difficult it was to find effective medication.

"There was a point when I felt like a medication guinea pig," he says.

Keith has empathy for those who are experiencing the same frustration. "I want there to be an easier way to prescribe medication for those living with bipolar," he explains. 

To those who are still struggling with mental illness, he knows that the process of finding the right treatment can be frustrating. He has this to say to them:

"Give it time. We all know the saying 'Time heals all wounds'. It’s true." 

Keith is very encouraging. "If you work hard, exercise, take your medication, find purpose, etc., you can find recovery."

And Keith has a very straightforward message to those who struggle with wanting to end their life.

“Don’t do it.”

He encourages people to remember their loved ones, and to have hope. He wants people to know that things do get better.

Of his own suicide attempt, Keith says "I feel blessed to still be alive. I realize now that life is a gift and you only have one. If I'd been successful in my attempt, there would have been so many beautiful things I would have missed, like the love that has flourished with my wife, and watching my son grow up. " 

One of the reasons why I was excited to feature Keith O'Neil on this blog is because it's clear that he's not only empathetic with those who suffer with mental illness, but he is also compassionate toward those like me, who have lost their loved ones to suicide.

I mentioned to Keith that the pain experienced by survivors is often complicated by guilt or blame. I asked him if he wanted to share something with those who are experiencing this type of complicated grief.

Keith admitted that the thought of losing someone this way is overwhelming. "You saved the hardest question for last," he told me. And yet about survivors taking on guilt, he was resolute.

"It’s not your fault. Suicide is an illness in itself."

When it comes to his efforts to end stigma and make a difference in the mental health arena, Keith knows that he has a lot to feel good about. Most especially, he is proud of the number of people his book and foundation have reached.

Of his advocacy work, Keith says "It’s very rewarding and gives me purpose, something I didn’t have when I was at my sickest moment."

It was an honor to speak to Keith O'Neil. He answered a lot of questions, but it was something he said to me in the very first message I received from him that touched my heart the most.

"Thanks for all you do Chelise, it's very important and we share the same passion."

I understand on a very personal level what it is like to use painful experiences as a motivation to help others. When it comes to turning around stigma, speaking out publicly, and most importantly - reaching out to those whose lives have been touched by mental illness and suicide - indeed, Keith O'Neil is right. He and I share the same passion.

I hope that Keith knows that he's not only helping those who are struggling with mental health issues, but he is also helping those of us who are trying to speak out the same way that he is. I can't thank him enough. And as for being in his company, I couldn't be more proud to be a fellow advocate.

You can find Keith's book on Amazon, here: 

Under My Helmet: A Football Player's LIfelong Battle wiht Bipolar Disorder: